Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Fed Up

There is always a time were a female reaches her boiling point and were she is fed up and not going to take all the pain and suffering a man can bring ; i can honestly say i believe i reached that point tonight ! Why do i keep giving this boy chance after chance? [WTF] is wrong with me? Am i that blind that i cant see he will never change no matter how many years passes by? Im tired of hurting ; Im tired of crying late at night asking if there is something wrong with me. No ; there is nothing wrong with me ; its obvious that there is something wrong with him ; he is the one who dont know when he has something good right in front of him. Why does he keep coming back into my life ; Why do i let him back in? Is the love that strong? How can he say he loves me and all he does is cause hurt and pain? He doesnt even epress that he loves and care anymore ; things are not the same, maybe im so stuck on how i want things to go back to when we first met, maybe thats the reason why i dont want to let him go. When we met the first time we was in love ; the late night phone calls ; talking all day everyday ; the i love you's and miss you's all the time. I want to feel that love sparkle again, but i dont know if i will ever and i dont know if i would ever feel that with someone else. It is so so fustrationg. We are two different people ; i thought opposites attract? [WTF] happen to us than? it worked before, we are both stubborn and i dont want to give in and neither does he so its not working. [UGH] he has so much growing up to do and he doesnt see it ; i dont think he is ready for me. What is a girl to do when she still on it? Im leaving everything behind ; the past is the past and i cant be dwelling on it, I have a future to look forward to, Im realizing he is not worth my time, im to good for him ; what he failed to realize is no one would ever love him like i did. It might of took me sometime to move on but i did ; life cant be on pause for one person to get there act right. im starting off with a new start and future.

One day i will find someone to love for me and only me and i promise i wont let them go.

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